


What Kind of Couple

by breakfastbeebo



Series: Ryden One-shots [4]
Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Domestic, Established Relationship, Grocery Shopping, M/M, Married Couple
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-09
Updated: 2016-10-09
Packaged: 2018-08-20 10:30:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8245762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breakfastbeebo/pseuds/breakfastbeebo
Summary: Some couples host dinner parties and trade recipes. Other couples can barely get through grocery shopping without flirting and flustering the other. Depending on the day, Ryan and Brendon can be either- or they can be both.





	

“Can’t I just stay in the car?” Brendon sighed, taking the keys out of the ignition, but not removing his seatbelt.

“Brendon, just come _in_ with me.” Ryan laughed, pulling on his wrist. “This dinner is in honor of you finishing _months_ of hard work. The least you could do for your over-worked, loving, and ever-supportive husband is walk him into the damn grocery store.”

Brendon pressed his lips together in consideration before sighing and opening his car door. “Fine. I’ll go with you; you’ve twisted my arm.”

“Thank you.” Ryan gave Brendon a grin _far_ too wide to be sincere and lifted a hand to rest under his chin. Brendon climbed out of the car reluctantly and walked over to Ryan, standing beside him with his arms crossed and face still. He just wanted to be home; after so much work and long-term focus and dedication, he just wanted to be at home with his husband, dogs at his feet and beer in his hand.

“What are we here for again?” He asked once Ryan began leading them towards the store. Ryan held up a finger and fished a piece of paper out of his pocket. He handed it to Brendon’s right hand and grabbed onto his left to hold between them. “Chicken, diced tomatoes, a _singular_ red pepper, basil, garlic, and a- a _large_ onion? Aren’t all onions kind of large in general?”

“Yeah, but some come smaller.” Ryan nodded, grabbing a basket as they walked through the automatic doors.

“We’re still talking about onions, right?” Brendon muttered, giving Ryan a glance through the side of his glasses.

“Oh, so we’re in _this_ kind of mood today.” Ryan sighed with a laugh, reaching over to rip the paper out of his hand with mock frustration. Brendon let his head hang back as he let out a short laugh, amused by Ryan’s reluctance to laugh at the joke- only him. “Just once I’d like to go shopping and have you be in the ‘dutiful husband’ mood.”

“Let’s try to keep things realistic, Ryan.”

“Right. We had a video idea where we literally wore fish tanks, but you being subdued and patient is definitely more far-fetched.” Ryan rolled his eyes and pulled Brendon along, still laughing.

“Where _did_ we get this oddly specific recipe anyway?” Brendon asked as they approached the produce section, ignoring Ryan’s growing laughter.

“It’s what we ate with Spencer and Linda last week; they gave me the recipe and I gave them that soup recipe from your mom. You know, that one I can’t seem to _ever_ get fucking right.” Ryan sighed and released Brendon’s hand as he reached for a pepper, inspecting it for bruises. Brendon’s hand remained in the space between them, waiting for Ryan’s return.

“Oh, so now we’re the type of couple that shares recipes with other couples?" 

“Didn’t even know that was an issue.” Ryan said, looking over his shoulder at Brendon. “We’re the type of couple that does a lot of things.”

“Yeah, but we’re the _fun_ couple.” Brendon countered, wrapping an arm around Ryan’s waist. “We throw parties and go on great vacations and tour the _world_. We don’t _trade recipes_ …”

“Oh, the two can’t coexist?” Ryan laughed, trying to slide Brendon’s hand off his hip. There was an older lady trying to buy corn on the other side of the shelf that seemed taken aback by the public affection at three in the afternoon. Brendon smiled at her brightly and let his hand slide up to rest between Ryan’s shoulder blades.

“Someone’s from the stone age…” Brendon muttered, peering over Ryan’s shoulder to see what was next on the list- and give his eyes a safe place to settle.

“Or she just doesn’t want to see you try and undress me next to the organic produce.” Ryan countered, stepping away from Brendon and leaving his hand up mid-air, holding onto his shadow.

“Don’t be _dramatic_.” Brendon sighed, taking quick strides to try and catch up to Ryan. “I would have waited until we got back to the car.”

Ryan rolled his eyes as he continued away from Brendon, leading him alongside the aisles. Brendon chased after him, reaching out and grabbing his hand when Ryan stopped to stare up at the rows of cans in front of them. He laced their fingers together, ignoring the quiet laughter from Ryan; he had his eyes fixed in front of him, but his lips pressing together to suppress a smile. Brendon pretended to be interested the shopping list again, resting his chin on Ryan’s shoulder to look at it. 

“You know, reading the fine print between cans of tomatoes gains a particular difficulty when you do that.” Ryan said quietly, reaching up with his free hand to turn and read a can.

Brendon cocked his head coyly. “Do what?”

“And that only makes it worse.” Ryan laughed, shaking his head and placing the can back.

“What- I’m still waiting for an answer.” Brendon allowed Ryan to step away and keep walking, but didn’t let their hands disconnect; he didn’t let Ryan avoid the question. That would make everything far too easy. “Do what?”

“This.”

“I am doing a lot of things right now.” Brendon stated, catching up and walking even with Ryan. Ryan kept shaking his head as they wound around the aisles. “I am walking, breathing, speaking, my heart is beating quite a bit too. What about that is so horrible?" 

“Nothing.” Ryan said, stopping at the end of an aisle shortly as a shopping cart nearly ran into them. Ryan stepped closer to Brendon to let the man pushing it pass by them. Brendon released Ryan’s hand in favor of wrapping an arm around his waist again as they huddled together briefly. Ryan leaned into him, but kept his head down and eyes fixated on the list in his hands.

“I’m still confused what the issue is here.” Brendon continued quietly as they started walking again, Ryan pressing against his side.

“You just,” Ryan sighed and rolled his eyes, presumably at himself. Brendon raised his eyebrows expectantly, waiting for him to continue. “You act like I’m the only thing you are interested in.” He stopped looking at the aisle numbers and instead looked over at Brendon, who had a mildly confused expression growing on his face. “Okay. Don’t look at me like that-”

“No, I just… I do that because it’s true.”

“And _there_ is my problem.” Ryan sighed, leaning toward Brendon and kissing him quickly. They didn’t miss a step and continued navigating the carts and people around them even though their eyes hadn’t quite left each other’s.

“Sounds like you are asking me to stop.”

“No. Never said that.” Ryan shook his head and glanced over at Brendon quickly. “It’s a problem I really don’t mind having.”

“Even if I keep distracting you from this boring couple’s dinner you are trying to make for your wildly successful and tired husband- who honestly wouldn’t mind just a _regular_ dinner, even if he has to make it for _you_?” Brendon asked, tugging Ryan into him as they rounded into a new aisle. It was void of other people but filled with spices. Brendon couldn’t remember a single one they needed.

“Even if my egocentric, big-headed, narcissistic husband complains about a meal I want to make _for him_ , I still don’t mind.” Ryan countered, turning to look at him with a smirk.

“I thought you were cooking for me.” Brendon said. “Who is this other husband of yours? Ryan, this is the first I have heard of him-”

Ryan shoved Brendon away from him with a nudge of his elbow, trying to hide his grin. Brendon enjoyed getting a rise out of Ryan, even after all their time being together- and definitely having their fair share of growing up. He enjoyed the moments that reminded him of them being young, stupid kids, poking at one another for no good reason. Except for the suppressed grin and faint blush growing on Ryan’s face- that was enough reason for Brendon.

“How many other things do we have to get?” Brendon asked, trying to recall the list. Ryan reached for the list and Brendon reached over to take it from his fingers. “I’m pretty sure we have everything on this list…”

“We have one thing on our basket.” Ryan noted, pointing to it as if Brendon didn’t see it.

“And I’m _saying_ , I’m pretty sure we have everything on this list.” Brendon repeated. “You know, at _home_.”

“Home.” Ryan echoed.

“Yeah, you know, that place that is twenty minutes from here.” Brendon continued, slowly coaxing the handle of the basket out of Ryan’s hand. “The place I can get us to as quickly as I can.”

“You know, I definitely think we have everything at home.” Ryan muttered, letting his hand release the basket. Brendon let it rest by their feet as he grabbed Ryan’s hand and tugged him towards the doors.

They walked as casually as they could back to their car, both of them immaturely tackling the urge to erupt into laughter. Brendon broke first, laughing as his hands fumbled with the car key- almost putting their house key into the door. Brendon finally got the right keys into the car door and then the ignition. Before the car engine could even turn over fully, Brendon was driving out of the parking lot to their house.

“I can’t believe you just got me to abandon my entire evening plans.” Ryan muttered, covering his face as his laughter caused a red blush to creep up his neck.

“What are you talking about? You still have plans for tonight” Brendon asked, speeding up to ease through a yellow light. “They just involve me now.”

“They involved you before!” Ryan pointed out. “I was going to make you dinner. I was going to cook for you.”

“You know,” Brendon said, pulling into their neighborhood. “I someone think this new plan is a _lot_ better.”

“And what plan is that.” Ryan asked, eyebrows quirked and eyes focused on Brendon. It made looking back at the road very difficult. Brendon almost didn’t, nearly missing their trashcans as he pulled into their driveway and throwing the car in park.

“The one where you don’t waste your time cooking me dinner and instead lay in bed with me and drink the rest of the beer in the fridge.” Brendon answered, swinging his door open and hopping out. He went to their front door, waiting to hear Ryan step up behind him before opening the door. “I mean, as long as you _prefer_ to do that over… _Following a recipe_.”

“How about,” Ryan started, pushing Brendon in the door softly. Brendon laughed and turned around and let Ryan’s hands push against his chest as they stumbled into the foyer. “I just follow you up the stairs instead.”

“I like that idea.” Brendon agreed, placing his hands over Ryan’s, trying to anchor him; it was easier to step forward and kiss Ryan when he wasn’t taking unsteady and tumbling steps, and when Brendon wasn’t trying to walk up a set of stairs backwards.

The landing came to a surprise to him and his feet stumbled beneath him, Ryan grabbing his shirt in one hand and his arm in the other, trying to keep him standing. If Brendon fell, they’d both go tumbling to the ground. And they definitely wouldn’t be getting back up. They were both giggling as they reached their bedroom door, none of their hands nimble enough to get it open without bumping into the other hand that was attempting to accomplish the same task.

Ryan finally go the door open and pushed it open with his foot, pulling Brendon after him. “You know, I really hate when you’re right.” He muttered, reaching over to Brendon and using one hand to hold his face and the other to begin twisting at the fabric of his shirt.

“What?” Brendon was barely listening to the words that were coming out of Ryan’s mouth; all he knew is that they were moving, but not while pressed against his own. “Right about what?”

“We are _definitely_ not the couple that trades recipes.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the anon and ililydun for suggesting this one! So cute.  
> If you have any prompts, domestic or not, send them in here or on tumblr (i'm @breakfastbeebo)


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